Amazing Race: All-Stars – All-Stars hlášky

5. Květen 2007 | napsal(a): Petr | reality show: Amazing Race

Jedenáctá řada dobrodružně-cestovatelské reality show má před sebou už jen nedělní finálovou epizodu, takže právě nyní je ten správný okamžik pro rekapitulování. Neoprávněně opomíjeným prvkem rekapitulací byly skvělé hlášky z úst soutěžících, a proto je jim věnován celý tento článek. Všechny jsou psány v angličtině proto, aby byla zachována ona vtipná pointa každé z nich.

1. díl | USA → Ekvádor

Danielle: (o svém vztahu s Ericem) When i first met him, I thought he was a Casanova; trying to get into the girls‘ pants. But he’s a gentleman and you don’t get that too much in New York.
Eric: I ran the race the first time with my best friend, but I’m more anxious about it this time around. This can make or break a relationship.

Danny: (o svém vztahu s Oswaldem) Now we’re platonic husband and husband.

Bill: (hovoří o Ianovi) Everybody underestimates him becasue he’s crotchety and old looking.

Drew: Peru is nice. It’s beautiful out.
Kevin: I’m sure it’s nice in Peru. We’re in Ecuador.

Danny: We know of Rob and Amber, because, obviously, we live on this planet.

John Vito: I’ve had enough of Rob and Amber. I think America may have also.

Drew: Did you see everyone pass me? I looked like an idiot.

Danny: I gotta catch my breath.
Oswald: I told you less martinis and more cardio.

2. díl | Ekvádor → Chile

Bill: Phil! (s roztaženýma rukama, aby ho mohl obejmout) The girls always get to do it, come on!

Bill: Who says gay men can’t drive?

Ian: In our last race and in this race, if we follow our motto of „stop, look and listen,“ we’ll do a lot better.

3. díl | Chile

Oswald: (v pitstopu si všiml trpaslíka) Charla’s gonna be in love.

Bill: Rob is not Jesus.

Mirna: I am sorry I am wearing a bathing suit. It is very weird, I know.

Mary: Charla’s boots was in my tent. I’d love to meet ’em and beat ’em.

Mary: Dave, why aren’t you getting any? Dave don’t never touch fish. He’s afraid of fish!

Eric: Dan! Use your boobs! You gotta use your boobs!
Oswald: (v kabátu z Detouru a rozevřenýma rukama běží k Philovi) I’m hugging you!
Phil: No way! (Phil uskočí, ale Oswald s Dannym k němu opět přiběhnou, aby ho objali. Domorodec, který soutěžící vítá, nemůže smíchy popadnout dech.)

4. díl | Chile → Argentina

Oswald: Wow-wee Maui!
Danny: Will you come with us?
Phil: That’s a whole different reality show.

Mirna: As an attorney, I know when somebody’s lying.

Mirna: (na Roba, když dokončila Roadblock před ním) See ya, don’t wanna be ya.

Phil: (na Joea a Billa) Could you guys be any more in love?

Uchenna: We’re taking the boat with Rob and Amber. Our old friends.
Rob: „Friends“ is being used loosely by Uchenna.

Rob: (čte dopis od Susan a Pattricka) Hopefully this letter finds you lost, broke, hungry, in last place.

Rob: I’m not trying to be arrogant or cocky. I’m just saying that I believe in us. I believe that we’re the strongest team here.

5. díl | Argentina → Mozambik

Charla: You guys know a lot of beauty tips.
Oswald: This is not beauty tips. This is like First Aid.

Ian: Maybe we can just wave a magic wand and get us on this flight.

Oswald: (na Charlu s Mirnou) This is our corner. We work this bench.

Teri: Phil, we’re coming.
Ian: We’re coming, Phil.

Teri: Maybe somebody will get stuck at the Roadblock and it won’t be us.
Ian: “Somebody” can only be the Guidos.

Mirna: So we’re looking for Philly.
Charla: Mr. Phil to you.

Uchenna: We’re headed for Mozambique.
Joyce: Is that Africa?
Uchenna: Yup.

Joyce: (kouká na svoji soutěžní krysu) He has a collar! That’s so cute!

Charla: Help me out, Mr. Ratty.

Danny: (zahalený v uhelném prachu) Do I look like Rambo?
Oswald: You look like a faggy raccoon.

Phil: Teri and Ian, you are team number three!
Ian: I don’t believe it!
Phil: You are team —
Ian: I don’t believe it!

6. díl | Mozambik → Tanzanie

Uchenna: (během rozhovoru na kameru) My father’s from Nigeria. Now we are going to Mozambique. We’re excited.

Teri: Is that definite — no more seats? Get me out of here.

Danielle: Hopefully we get a good flight to Tanzania.
Eric: Where the Tanzanian Devil lives.

7. díl | Tanzanie → Polsko

Oswald (na pianistu, se kterým plnil Detour): If I were in town, I would ask for your number.

Mirna: (čte informace o Detour) Perfect Angel or Perfect Pitch?
Charla (opravuje): Angle.

Joe: (na Billa při vybírání figuríny k Detour) Pick the hunkiest one.

Charla: (při plnění Detour) Why is it all men? Don’t they have women mannequins?

Mirna: What are you doing? You’re supposed to get out of the x-ray!
Charla: We’re supposed to cover his private parts.

Mirna: Nobody wants to talk to us. It’s like we’re the plague or something.

Charla: (na řidiče taxíku) You like Polish hot dogs? You like Polish sausages? Sausage good?
Mirna: He doesn’t like us too much.

8. díl | Polsko

Charla: This is fun task. After the naked mannequin and now the sausage.

Mirna: Here horsey, horsey. Horsey, I have sausage.

Eric: Ladies and gentleman, Miss California!

Joe: (na Charlu v brnění) She looks like a dressed up rat.

9. díl | Polsko → Malajsie

Oswald: (k Dannymu) So I was worried about you and you were having lemonade? We’re so even right now.

Danny: Do the cookie, it’s faster.
Oswald: What? 600 boxes? It’s faster than this?
Danny: It’s faster. Trust me.

Charla: Ozzie and Danny just came, Mirna.
Mirna: I can see. I’m not blind.

Eric: (mluví k Dustin a Kandice) Guys we have bad news. Charla and Mirna are not nice.

Mirna: We have a lot of fans it turns out, here in Malaysia, and they really boost our egos.

Uchenna: (on phone to airline employee) We have to get to Kuala Lumpur today. Our life depends on it.

10. díl | Malajsie → Hongkong

Mirna: (během Detour mluví k Charle) How are you gonna climb that? Each step is longer than your legs!

Mirna: Close that door. Close that door.
Čínský steward v letadle: It’s okay. Keep it open.
Charla: No, it’s too cold. It’s too cold.

Mirna: (ke kungfu bojovníkům během Detour) Okay, okay, that’s enough fighting. We are trying to make love, not war.

11. díl | Hongkong → Macao (Čína)

Danny: (v parku Lou Lim Ioc Garden) Wow, this is absolutely gorgeous.
Oswald: Too bad we can’t stay and smell the roses.

Eric: I’m gonna kick down Danny and Oswald’s face when I see them.

Danny: There is no way to explain to Eric and Danielle why we yielded them. It was bad karma versus no money.

Dustin: 45 dollars to yield Eric & Danielle.
Kandice: It’s like we’re bribing them not to Yield us.

Oswald: Are we allowed to prostitute ourselves on the race?

Eric: (během Detour) I just want to get this done and kill Danny and Oswald.

12. díl | Macao (Čína) → Guam

Mirna: (na Dustin s Kandice) Charla said they don’t know how to use the Internet.

Oswald: (během roztrhávání první obálky) Roadblock! No, kidding.

Oswald: Hello. Did I just passed you like a thousand times?
Pilot: Yes.
Oswald: You were right here?
Pilot: Uh-huh.
Oswald: All the time?
Pilot: It’s good camouflage. Here you are. (podává Oswaldovi zpátky GPSku)
Oswald: How much do I not like you.

Mirna: (k Charle před plněním Roadblocku) Careful. Follow instructions. God be with you. Use the GPS, it tells you which way to go. You should not press any buttons. Do you understand that?

Oswald: (u terminálu trajektu) There are no signs from the other teams. We’re assuming they’re already running around like chickens without their heads at the Hong Kong airport.

Oswald: v autě směřujícím do pitstopu Oswald and Danny…
Oswald a Danny najednou: …you’re the last team to arrive.
Danny: Not fair, no. I want to stay.

Charla: (během Roadblocku s GPSkou) Is that the arrow?
Voják: Ma’am, I told you not to touch the screen.

Oswald: při pohledu na malou Charlu v obleku Oh my God, the Teletubbies go to war. I am at the landing zone for pickup.

Oswald: (v závěrečném rozhovoru) We know that karma was a particular bitch on the last leg of the race and we got slapped hard for it. But we have asked for forgiveness from the universe and we hope things will go our way.

Máte nějaké další oblíbené hlášky, které v tomto seznamu chybí? Podělte se o ně v komentářích!